susanne schuricht

between being awake and aslepp

2005

what do you think
in the time between
beeing awake and
not yet sleeping
or the other way
around –

what goes through your mind?

these pictures and stories
are an extract of a first
questionnaire.

photo series
between wakefulness and
sleep

"medallion" photographs

c-print
3 x 4 cm each

limited edition, 5
2006

courtesy of the artist

Zwischen Wach- und Schlafzustand träume ich mich sehr oft aus meinen Dramen raus und sinniere ein normales Leben - eine normale Welt. Aber das führt dann auch immer wieder dazu, das ich anfange, das Normale als bedrückend zu empfinden - dann spinne ich die Ideen, die sich dann in Zweigen verlieren, aber Vieles von dem ist am nächsten Tag noch da. Klaus

hypnagogia and hypnopompia,
are the names of experiences
a person can go through
when falling asleep in the
case of hypnogogia, or
waking up, in the case of
hypnopompia.

the term was coined by the
19th century french psycho-
logist alfred maury.

many artists, musicians, archi-
tects, engineers, and others
demanding creativity to be
successful have benifited from
the hypnogogia state, where
the mind can be totally free and
open to creative and new ideas.
(source: wikipedia)

When I'm lying there
I am reading adventure stories and being thrilled
thinking of high red-brown mountains
and long lonely lyrics of gaelic songs
and high winds and soft rains in the air
I think of my Scottish ancestors,
the McGregors of the kilt and sporran
and the whisky makers and drinkers
and my English ancestors
who mined coal in Kent,
and listened to Jazz on Brighton beach
and I think about sex
and how much love is lost each day
through a lack of thought
and a lack of eye contact
and I wonder if I can sleep
and if I should go to get a glass of warmed milk
or have another cigarette
and if I'll ever give them up
and the pillows piled up make my neck ache
and my back takes the strain
and then I'm asleep
matth

links

wikipedia
forteantimes
serendip
mindmachine

In the time between wake and sleep, I usually have sensual fantasies or sexual fantasies.
In the sensual ones, I am at a spa (I have never really been to a spa . ... It seems too self-indulgent). Sometimes the spa is in Japan, sometimes in Bali, sometimes in France. Beautiful women give me a manicure and pedicure. They joke with each other and laugh.
Then, I am bathed like an infant. (My earliest memory in life was of my being washed in a sink by a black maid.) The women cut my hair, including my body hair. Two of the women massage me. They feed me fruit. There is the sound of a stream and a distant sound of gentle music. Then I sleep.

The sexual fantasies are usually voyeuristic. I am watching two women make love. I am watching my wife make love with two other men. Sometimes the fantasy is about me and young men (I was bisexual when I was younger). I have these fantasies and drift into sleep, partially aroused - but too tired to wake my wife.

When I am waking, I sometimes look at my sleeping wife. I gaze at her face and hair. If she is sleeping with her back toward me, I marvel at the curve between her ribs and her hip. I love that curve. And I love the shape of her ass. Usually I awake to the sound of my daughter making coffee downstairs before she goes to school, at seven o'clock. I love the sound of the coffee grinder waking me. I wait another few minutes, dreaming of coffee. When the attraction to coffee and my first cigarette is stronger than the pull back into sleep, I really wake up. David

--
mich träumte, ich hätte einen hof voll kleiner weißer enten, die liefen alle durcheinander und kümmerten sich gar nicht um mich, obwohl ich sehr besorgt war, ob ihnen denn wohl nichts passierte und sie auch genug zu tun hätten, um zufrieden zu sein. aber schau an, einige der größeren nahmen die kleineren, gebrechlichen und fußkranken einfach auf den rücken huckepack. und die besonders älteren und klügeren sogar legten sich im paar die flügel gegenseitig über den rücken und bildeten so ein breiteres polster, damit die besonders wackligen nicht herunterfielen. das fand ich wohl sehr nett von ihnen und irgendwie sehr berührend, und so konnte ich beruhigt und zufrieden aufwachen, wenn auch nicht ohne etwas abschiedsweh. yo

Wenn ich abends alleine daliege,
fängt mein körper an zu sprechen
Weil er genug hat von den konventionen
und dem verhalten, dass ich ihm tagsüber auferlege

Manchmal windet er sich und verdreht sich
und geniesst die flexibilität die er eigentlich besitzt
Dann erzählt er mir, wie gerne er eigentlich tanzt
und träumt davon eine tänzerin zu sein

Manchmal krümmt er sich, weil er verschwinden will,
zurückkriechen in ein schützendes ei
Dann erzählt er mir, dass er einsam und traurig ist,
dass er genug hat, von der grausamen welt

Manchmal liegt er einfach da
und spürt, wie die weiche decke sich um ihn legt
Dann erzählt er mir, dass er berührt werden will
und meine hand gleitet über seine haut
mi

su(@)sushu.de

normally my falling asleep is very mundane, either passing out in my chair with headphones on, or falling asleep to a book so as not to think of the person who isn´t there with me. of course i was long a professional at not going to bed, the finality of it, the little death, and like in death, that short period of recollection and evaluation of yourself that happens before the lights go out. i always avoided that. i guess its the only time when we are really alone in a day, without the distractions of radio, sun, doing the washing, friends. my favourite time to fall asleep is during the day, when all those existential pressures are not due to fall. you lie in the park, and as you drift a kind of sonic dreamy shift of sound occurs, where all the balances of amplification move, you feel like your brain is breathing in time with a big ocean of wind and sound, and i´m always struck by a feeling that i never heard like that before.
i guess its just the brain switching from specific local, to general hearing in order to pick up any approaching tigers, meteors or debt collectors, the last one having oft been something i think about when falling asleep.

i wake up very slowly, it can take up to two hours but normally one, where i fall back to sleep, dream a little, wake up, look at the light, feel the ambience of my surroundings, fall back to a short dream, and if i´m really lucky, then i can have one of those park type moments, and if i´m extra lucky then i´ll have someone to fall in and out of sleep with, and thats so much sweeter, with hair in your face and soft smells to inhale and dream to.

on holiday in nz i woke up, reached out from the bed to the door, opened it, lay back down and let the fresh sea air and birdsong into the room. i could hear the sprinklers on the golf course and the sticky smell of wet trees drifted in with the sun. at the same time i could hear the fan in my parents room, because my mother cannot sleep with silence, and needs a fan to make a hum that drowns it out. on that holiday my mother tried out all the fans in the holiday park, and one of my memories of that trip, is of the owner walking towards our little cabin, her arms filled with an assortment of different makes of fan heaters, cables trailing behind her, and a bewildered expression on her face. i guess none of us can bare to face death, and why should we, but i think i´m getting better at it, and wish my mum would to. shannon

--
Wenn ich nicht gerade, was meistens der Fall ist, bum einschlafe, dann ist das der Zeitpunkt an dem Gedanken über denn Lauf und Sinn des Lebens hochkommen. Je nach Gesamtstimmung entweder: Oje, oje was soll nur werden, oder: Was auch immer passiert, wunderbar. Titus

--
schlaflos in aeloplane - (sleepless in aeloplane) pdf in german and thai english sushu